Coach Mike, LPC, MPC
Picture the first practice of a new season. The gym smells new, the whistle hasn’t blown, and the athlete is already replaying how last season ended. The missed free throw. The minutes on the bench. The last game nobody wanted to talk about. Nobody has said a word about this season yet, and last season is already in charge.
Winter seasons are starting now: basketball, wrestling, swimming, hockey, and club volleyball are all ramping up. Plenty of athletes arrive carrying a playing-time story, a result, or a mistake they never put down. Parents carry it too. We remember what happened last year, and we brace for it to happen again before anyone has taken a rep.
Neither of those helps the athlete play well this season.
Presence starts with seeing clearly
In the PEAK Framework, Presence means seeing reality clearly. At the start of a season, that means separating two things that get blended together: what happened, and the story you’ve attached to it.
“I got two minutes of playing time last season” is a fact. “I’m not good enough, and the coaches have already decided” is a story. The fact is useful information. The story is weight, and it shows up in your body before practice starts: tight shoulders, a quiet voice, a constant worry.
Most of us never stop to tell the two apart. We just feel the story and assume it’s true.
Expectations versus facts
Expectations are predictions about the future. Facts are what’s true right now. Athletes often walk in with expectations that feel like facts: “I’ll start,” “we’ll win the conference,” “the coach doesn’t like me anymore.”
Some of those expectations may turn out to be reasonable. Write them down anyway, and sort them into two columns. What do you actually know? What are you guessing? You’ll usually find the guesses take up far more room than the facts.
So what can you control in the first two weeks?
The first two weeks of any season are for learning the system, the teammates, and the way the coach runs things. They are not a verdict on the year.
What you control: your effort on every rep, how you prepare before practice, how you talk to teammates, and how you respond when a coach gives you feedback. What you don’t control: the roster decisions, what the coach is thinking about you, or whether last year’s result repeats.
When the focus stays on the things in your control, a bad rep becomes information instead of a decision on your season.
Remember: early-season nerves and role worries are normal
Every new season brings a reset. Nobody knows yet who’s starting, who’s in the rotation, or who’s the next player to step up. Feeling unsettled when you don’t know your role is what most athletes feel, and most of the athletes who seem calm are feeling it too.
Nerves in week one don’t mean you’re behind. They mean the situation is new. Give yourself the same patience you’d give a teammate who was learning a new position.
A composite example
The following is a composite based on several athletes and parents I’ve worked with, not one specific person.
A club athlete came into fall practice convinced her coach had written her off after a rough tournament the spring before. Every mistake in drills felt like proof. When she didn’t get the first few reps in a scrimmage, she spent the rest of practice watching the bench instead of playing.
We didn’t start with a plan to change the coach’s mind. We started by separating the facts from the story. The fact was that she had played about forty minutes in that tournament. The story was that she was finished on this team. Once she could see those as two different things, she picked one process goal for the next two weeks: get extra reps on serve receive before warmup, and track whether she did it. She stopped scoring each practice as a result and started counting her reps.
Within a few weeks, she was the one asking the coach for feedback. Her playing time didn’t change overnight. Her relationship to the season did.
Parents do the same thing. A parent who replays last season’s minutes can walk to the car after the first practice with last year’s question ready to go. Before you ask it, ask yourself: am I bringing last season into this car?
Carry, drop, start: a five-minute exercise before day one
Grab a notebook or your phone and set a five-minute timer. Write three short lines.
Carry: One thing from last season worth taking forward. A skill you improved, a teammate you trust, a lesson you learned the hard way. One sentence is enough.
Drop: One story you’re ready to put down. Write the story first, then write the fact that sits underneath it. Ask yourself: is this a fact or a story? If it’s a story, cross it out. You don’t have to win an argument with it. You just don’t have to carry it onto the court.
Start: One process goal for the first two weeks. It should be something you control, not a result. “Arrive fifteen minutes early and get extra reps before warmup” works. “Earn a starting spot” doesn’t, because you can’t control it.
The season doesn’t need to start with last season
Last year happened. It’s part of your story, and you don’t have to pretend it didn’t. But it doesn’t have to be the first thing you bring to practice.
Carry what helps. Drop what weighs you down. Start with something you can control this week.
If you’re carrying something heavier than the game itself, you don’t have to sort it out alone. Individual mental performance sessions are built for exactly this. Athletes work through the story they’re telling about themselves. Parents get their own session too, to work through how to support their athlete without adding pressure and how to read what their kid needs in the moment.
Book a parent session →
https://m2performance.janeapp.com/